Discussion Group Details
Pali Paths is a casual discussion group for people interested in ethical alternatives to conventional relationships.
Pali Paths is NOT a swinger’s group or a single’s group or a place to pick up people; it’s a discussion group on new forms of family and new models for relationships.
Pali Paths is open to all. We welcome people of any age, race, ethnicity, religion, sexual preference or relationship status. Our only rule is respect.
Pali Paths meets each week at a local church to share new ideas about romance, family, culture, ethics, child-rearing and more. The atmosphere is comfortable, safe, relaxed and fun. Join us. Bring a friend.
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When and Where
WHEN:
First and Third Thursday nights from 7 to 9 p.m.
WHERE:
The First Unitarian Church of Honolulu
2500 Pali Highway
Meeting Room 2, second floor
A $2.00 donation is requested to help pay for room rental and advertising.
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Meeting Format
7:00 - 7:10 Gathering and greeting
7:10 - 7:45 Check-in and introductions (pillow talk)
7:45 - 8:00 Announcements
8:00 - 9:00 Discussion of the announced topic
9:00 - ?:?? After-meeting socializing, location determined at meeting (usually at Zippy's on Vineyard and Maunakea or Cold Stone Creamery ice cream parlor at Ward Theater)
What To Expect
What is the group like?
Many people are a little intimidated the first time they come to any new group. There are different kinds of groups in the world: support groups, encounter groups, therapy groups, etc. Pali Paths is a discussion group on open relationships.
Some people have said they were afraid of what they might find in the group. Is it some kind of sex group? Will strange people try to hit on me or try to pressure me into doing things I don't want to? Is it some kind of religious group?
The answer to all these questions is 'no'. Pali Paths is not a sex group, it is a discussion group. All we do is talk. It is not a place to hit on people, or a single's group, or a swinger's group, or a place to pick up people; it's a discussion group on open relationships and new forms of family. Although it is held in a church, it is not a religious group, it is a discussion group.
No one is encouraged to do or say or share anything at all. If you feel like sitting back and listening, please do. Most people can't help chiming in, even shy people feel safe here. The atmosphere is friendly and relaxed. Even when the topics are serious, the talks are fun. Sometimes people bring their kids. We often go out for ice cream afterwards. It's that kind of a group.
It is perfectly ok to come alone if you want. You don't need to bring anything; even the donation is voluntary.
What do you discuss?
Mostly, the discussions are on alternatives to traditional monogamous relationships. How to make it work, potential problems and rewards, etc. People share tools for making relationships of any kind work better. We have a different topic each week. Common discussion themes are: dealing with jealousy, polyamorous families, the anatomy of relationships, dealing with fears, loving oneself, sexuality, and a lot of miscellaneous. The topics touch on history, psychology, culture, economics, sexuality, politics, anthropology, sociology and more. The emphasis is on personal growth and mutual support in all our relatoinships.
What kind of people are in the group?
The FAQ also has a good answer to this question. Usually, 6 to 15 people show up. The actual membership is probably closer to 60 people, but many people attend infrequently. The gender mix is pretty even most nights. Most people are in their 40s and 50s, although there are people in their 20s through their 70s. There are a wide variety of educational backgrounds, career paths, political philosophies and religions. Some of us are involved in more than one loving relationship. Some of us are involved in less than one.
For most people, relationships are the most challenging things they ever do. In the group, we share ideas and tools for making relationships healthier.